Friday, January 13, 2017

imperfect humans!!

you wouldn't think it would be so hard to love yourself.
we've got the concept of beauty all wrong, so wrong, that we look in the mirror and pick ourselves apart.
i see my skin as one big flaw. it is embedded in us to buy serums, mists, moisturizers, layers and layers of treatments, ointments, salves-all to become beautiful. we have it warped.
we are mistaken, for not seeing our skin as pure & simple beauty. not until it's smoothed and edited.
i go a day without makeup and end up feeling the need to avoid eye contact with other human beings.
simply because my dark circles are showing, my freckles are there, and my skin is a little bit blushed red. we feel prettier with our eyes lined, our lips colored, and our face flawless because that's all we've learned to be.
without it, others notice. we look sick, are we okay? our appearances are only acceptable when we're telling lies.
the human canvas is imperfect. the liquids and creams we slab on are just chemicals, and our bodies absorb them. we forget what we're buying into-cONsuMERism and trendy mARKetinG!!

we wonder why we looked tired and drowned out, but we stuff chemicals into our bodies and we put chemicals onto our faces. we stare at screens all day and lack fresh air. we suffocate ourselves with the lives of others, the constant stream of information, true or false, relevant or irrelevant. there's always something new to get in order to be in the know.

but maybe i don't want to know anymore. there's too much to keep up with in order to stay relevant. we are constantly connected, yet i feel that i don't really know anyone. maybe this is just a phase, but this media frenzy we live in is exhausting.

i forget to tend to myself because all i do is compare myself with others. their lives, their clothes, their style, their friends-it's a trap! in the chaos of it all, i've lost sight of myself. i've lost all sense of what makes me, me. there's so much to look at, to consider, that i'm stuck trying to find my place in all of it.

so i guess, i'm just trying to give myself a fresh start. kind of strip down to the basics, and not get so caught up in all of "it".
right now, for me, that means giving my skin a break from all of these skincare/beauty trends (because lord knows i don't really give a shit, but social media for some reason has made me want** to give a shit). it means trying really hard not to get caught up in what the world says is in, now, or current. it just means to stop fretting & letting things fall into place...
because they will.

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